The Contractor That I Don’t Have

There are two sides to every story, and yesterday’s New York Times had the contractor’s tale.  Fascinating for its portrayal of the beleaguered good guy contractor (where are you? who are you?), it attempts to shake up the asshole myth.  In reading about what clients do to torture and harass their contractors, I am disgusted by what people think that they can get away with - delaying final payment for petty details, calling at inappropriate times, poaching the help.  But at the top of the list of annoyances is “avoid making decisions”.  Why, that’s me!  While I couldn’t imagine the sheer rudeness of these other acts, I was the worst offender of all in my inability to make decisions.  I guess it’s a good thing that I don’t have a GC.

It’s Like Christmas

Except that I am my own Santa Claus.  All these new fancy boxes are presents for me and me alone.  The oven came first this morning via Urban Express.  Then my cabinetmaker made his delivery while I was at work, coming home to more surprises.  So far I’m loving it, as I peek into the doors and drawers.  I’m particularly smitten with my corner carousel, practical and so accessible.  I’m excited as I lay my arms on the top of the counter height cabinet, checking the ergonomics, pretending to cook.

I thought that I’d be living in a cabinet canyon until installation, but there’s an okay amount of room to move.  Certain passageways are narrow (to the right of the table), and some access is completely blocked (the pantry/bookshelves), but it’s not as invasive as I thought it would be.  There is more to come - the bookcases, the un-broom closet, the peninsula - but that won’t fit in the apartment until the rudimentary kitchen work is done.  Whenever that will be.

Attack of the Plastic Bags

You are probably looking at these photos, thinking that I must be a crazy hoarder bag lady.  I can’t deny that there isn’t a small grain of truth to this, but the bigger question is why do I have all these bags?  I’m pretty conscientious about bringing my own bag when I shop so that I don’t take one.  Sometimes it’s unavoidable - spontaneous purchases, doggie bags from restaurants, etc. The sad fact of the matter is that this collection of bags mostly came to my front door - over a year’s worth of bags from the New York Times.  Yup, every day, I get one or two bags, free with my paper.  Not that I don’t use them - I bring my lunch, I bring back the empties, and then I dispose of cat litter - a three stage life cycle before it hits the trash.  I also use them for produce in the fridge, to hold shoes when I travel, wet umbrellas, but I still can’t put a bag in the 365+ bags.  So now I have to use another big plastic bag to throw out more bags.  Now that’s crazy. 

Oven Accomplished!

For my umpteenth trip to Ikea, I wanted to do swift business - order my oven and leave.  I saw no reason to call upon a car favor for this quick trip, so I took the Ikea shuttle from Port Authority as early as reasonably possible for me on a Saturday morning.  Hopefully, I would avoid  standing in line for an hour for a five minute transaction.  A painless half hour ride on the bus, by noon, the store had some intense shoppers but nowhere near the afternoon throng.

I quickly checked out the three versions of the Mumsig oven - white, black, and stainless steel.  The white was surprisingly cute with it’s shiny finish and shorter abbreviated handle, but I was worried that it would be a near miss with the white cabinets, which would defy an “invisible” all white objective.  Black is so not my style, though my architect liked it, it’s too slick, the Drakaar Noir of the ovens.  So silver it would be, just like the DeLonghi, and tying in with all the other appliances.

I barely had to wait in line to order, service was helpful, and oddly enough, the oven was actually in stock at the store, even though I had checked the website (which allows you to see if items are in stock at your local store), and the tag on the display said “oversold”.  Maybe it’s luck for all the heartache I’ve endured with the oven, or I’m getting someone else’s lemon, or these big box stores are rife with misinformation.  I’m going to think positive.  I go downstairs to pay for it, and then arrange for home delivery later this week for an extra $100.  Ruefully, I think if I had only known that it was in stock, I would’ve called in a car favor, but I guess it’s better than wrestling with the box from door to door. 

To top off my feeling of accomplishment, I rewarded myself with lunch in the cafeteria.  I really do love the swedish meatballs, even though they are one step above a salisbury steak TV dinner.  For $5, I love it even more.  Throw in the view of Newark airport to watch the planes depart and land, it’s a unique dining experience.  I also stopped at the Market place for the “Good” muesli, which I’ve grown to really like, and the “Daim” mini chocolate toffees.  Daim they’re Good!

Homemade Bahn-Mi

From the disparate elements in my fridge, I had almost all the ingredients for a bahn-mi, one of my favorite sandwiches ever.  A crusty roll, roast beef, cilantro, pickled carrots, hot sauce, and mayonnaise, have been living in the fridge, brought in for different reasons and at different times.  All I needed was pate, and we have a sandwich.  As suspected, a slice of pate from Whole Foods was $3.30, almost the price of a bahn-mi in Chinatown.  But now I can make multiple bahn-mis.

Bahn-mi

-toast a crusty roll

-slice crosswise and while still hot, slather some pate on one half

-on the other half, spread a schmear of mayonnaise and dashes of hot sauce

-on top of that, add some roast beef, a few sprigs of cilantro, and some pickled carrots

-top with the pate half

Since there are so many flavors going on, it pays to be generous with the ingredients.  I’m sure that other meats can be substituted like slices of roast turkey, something fairly plain to contrast the pate.  Cucumbers could be a good addition or substitute to carrots to provide a refreshing crunch.

Two days after making bean salad, I have to admit, it was kind of a bust.  Maybe it’s the absence of garlic or onions to which it would act as a foil to the more aromatic cilantro and lemon.  Maybe instead of lemon, lime would have been better.  In short, the salad tastes like 7Up.  Since then, I’ve added hot sauce which gives it a piquant spiciness to cover up the uncola taste.

A Plan of Action

Nothing’s been done since my electrical epiphany, but I am on a course of improvement.  The book case is only attached to the wall by way of two screws on the top shelf, not difficult, certainly not as hard as the paper towel holder.  It was only a matter of moving all the books and  unscrewing it.  I couldn’t move it because it is so massive, but I am relieved to know that it won’t fall apart like my Ikea Expedit when I tried to move it.

I’ve decided to get the Ikea oven after all.  For $1300 more, I couldn’t really justify DeLonghi being that much better of a brand, a company that specializes in toaster ovens and espresso makers.  And I actually think the Ikea is cuter.  AM Royal was disappointed in my cancellation, but were nice enough to try to find me an alternative, only a GE and a Frigidaire, and they were both unfortunate looking.  

In true Ikea ill-logic, I could order the oven over the phone and it would be delivered in 2-3 weeks; or I can trek to the store, order it there, and have it in 2-3 days.  It all has to do with the delivery warehouse centers.  One would think that it would come from the closest warehouse to delivery point - but that would make too much sense and not waste enough of one’s time.  I know what I’m doing this weekend.

The cabinets are ready, but the kitchen is not.  A majority of the work is supposed to be done today - rewiring and tiling - so installation next week is very possible.  I’ll believe it when I see it. 

Sad

I’d really like to have a kitchen.  I’d really like to prepare food the way that I like it.  I’d really like to wash my dishes in a sizable sink.  I’d really like to have my food and dishes and stuff in one place.  All in good time, I suppose, but right now, it’s a drag to feed myself.

Eating out all the time is not a good option for my wallet, or my waistline.  I like my sandwiches fine, but that too can be fattening, or monotonous.  Sometimes I just want a salad.  Even though a salad doesn’t require much cooking, it’s an effort to put together when there’s no space and the cutting board doesn’t fit in the bathroom sink.  My black bean salad wasn’t as good as it usually is due to not being able to mince the jalapeno and cilantro as well as I would like given my teeny backup cutting board and paring knife.  It’s time to go back to sandwiches. 

Black Bean Salad

-drain and rinse 1 - 15 oz. can black beans

-mince 1 jalapeno pepper and 1/3 cup cilantro

-toss with 1T olive oil and juice of 1/2 lemon and salt and pepper to taste

Minced scallions or garlic would add spicy piquantness.  Chopped roasted red bell pepper or tomato would give color and contrast.  All welcome additions if on hand in a working kitchen.  

I Can Dream…

I spent three hours this weekend rearranging my furniture in preparation for the imminent raping, I mean, rewiring of my apartment.  The table moved to the window for a change, the bookshelf/pantry is now in the living room, and a the small lazy susan table that I’ve been using as a desk serves as an intermediary kitchen counter.  It almost makes the kitchen area spacious.  This configuration would allow for a full size fridge, or at least the supermodel of fridges, the Liebherr CS1350 -no ice maker.  The kitchen could afford more room, if the pantry was outside.  And a possible island/counter where the wall is.  I’ve seen other units in my building, on my line, that have renovated as such - 1) the kitchen was extended into the living area along the wall, but the apartment was extended as well, into a combo with the apartment next door, turning my apartment into a kitchen/dining room/office; 2) an island separated the hall from the kitchen, and 3) the coat closet next to the kitchen was knocked out to make it bigger.  Those who know me, know that 3) is not an option.  I may have The Littlest Kitchen, but I also have The Largest Wardrobe.

 

This dream bubble popped when I expressed this idea to a friend who said, “Ugh, you wouldn’t want your fridge in the middle of your apartment”.  He’s right, and I have a plan, a good plan to follow.

The Electric Problem

Maybe not so much of a problem a my own ignorance.  I did not realize that in order to add a new line of electricity that they will have to cut open the wall to lay the lines to the fuse box.  All the way to the fuse box.  The problem is that my fuse box is behind a fixed bookcase.  So fixed, that in order to get to the fuse box, there was a cut out in back, should I need to access it.  Now the whole thing needs to come out, hopefully without being destroyed.  It breaks my heart.

I guess I thought that the electric fairy would magically be able to connect the new circuits.  Not so.  But in order to have enough juice in the kitchen, not one but two lines need to be laid down, especially since my oven needs to be electric, not gas.  I have to be 200% safe with this, and if it means more time effort and money, so be it.

When I got news of this, it was right before I was heading out to see Cai Guo-Qiang at the Guggenheim.  An oddly appropriate exhibit to see in my state of mind, the gunpowder “paintings” and installations eased my pain a bit.  Prevailing in the work was the idea of in destruction there is creation.  Cai’s elaborate pieces whose laborious preparations take enormous time and effort, is gone in seconds, leaving behind a whole new being.  Granted that my kitchen can’t be compared to art, but seeing transformation on such a grand scale, gives me new hope.

This Week’s Progress

Running at a good clip, the cement has been laid down and cracks filled, the shelves have been taken down and filled, and a new line has been put in. All improvements, but I’m still not ready for installation next week. The tiles haven’t been put down, the electricity isn’t done, I don’t even have an oven yet, and my beloved cabinet could use some more TLC. I’m not bothered. I’d rather have it done right and slowly, than shoddily and on time.

I have managed to get that pesky screw out of the cabinet, all it took was the right tool, a heavy duty plier/pincher thing. It came out in seconds.